I feel the need to share this...even though I just started it on the way to work this morning...and I have only completed the first two and a half lines...its been a truly AMAZING morning...I apologize that this isn't finished but I am being told to not hold it until it is...so here it goes:
Lord
(from the heart of me)
When our world is cover in ice
YOU are the fire that warms us
When storms rage and toss us
YOU are the anchor that holds us
When our bodies are sick and broken
YOU mend our spirit
When I cry out
YOU dry the tears within
(this last line just came to me now as I am writing)
Friday, February 27, 2009
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Sunrise and a promise
Yesterday as I arrived at work and was pulling into my parking spot I witnessed a sight I had never seen before...sunrise with a rainbow right beside the sun. It was so beautiful. I have been having a very emotional week so of course this brought me to tears. It was as if God was saying to me "This is not the end, but a beginning to something amazing"
This winter has been especially harsh in more ways than one. We are still uncertain what our future holds and as Scott's retirement date draws ever closer I am getting more and more stressed about finding a job and getting us out of here.
I have been applying for every administrative job I can find but haven't had any success yet. Still praying that perfect job that is meant to be opens up or is one that I've applied for and I will get "the call"
Todays weather forecast:
A powerful storm system continued to move out across the northern plains early this Thursday morning. The most significant snows will be south of the Interstate 94 / U.S. Highway 10 corridor of southeast North Dakota and west central Minnesota. Snow will be heavy at times, with total accumulations from 5 to 12 inches expected in southeast North Dakota into west central Minnesota by this evening, with the highest amounts close to the North and South Dakota border where over 1 foot is possible. Dangerous wind chills from 25 to 30 below are also expected for northeast North Dakota and northwest Minnesota today and tonight. Northerly winds will increase through the day, with blowing and drifting snow expected in the Red River Valley.
This winter has been especially harsh in more ways than one. We are still uncertain what our future holds and as Scott's retirement date draws ever closer I am getting more and more stressed about finding a job and getting us out of here.
I have been applying for every administrative job I can find but haven't had any success yet. Still praying that perfect job that is meant to be opens up or is one that I've applied for and I will get "the call"
Todays weather forecast:
A powerful storm system continued to move out across the northern plains early this Thursday morning. The most significant snows will be south of the Interstate 94 / U.S. Highway 10 corridor of southeast North Dakota and west central Minnesota. Snow will be heavy at times, with total accumulations from 5 to 12 inches expected in southeast North Dakota into west central Minnesota by this evening, with the highest amounts close to the North and South Dakota border where over 1 foot is possible. Dangerous wind chills from 25 to 30 below are also expected for northeast North Dakota and northwest Minnesota today and tonight. Northerly winds will increase through the day, with blowing and drifting snow expected in the Red River Valley.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Home Improvement?
After spending my entire commute home yesterday in tears, I came home and hit the net...looking for an escape hatch...winter is getting to me big time and I am on the verge on a mental breakdown...and you know what they say "when mamma ain't happy..."
So Jaiden and I are now going to take a little vacation...to FLORIDA!....for 5 days we will be able to get outside and play :) I am so excited about that....I can't hardly breathe here anymore, being cooped up indoors for 5 months and then being sick on top of that...is just misery.
Its still sinking in...after I hit book the trip of course a million doubts crept into my head so I could hardly get to sleep last night. Scott is supportive of this, it was his idea that I take a trip and he made the suggestion months ago...but I didn't want to spend the money with things so uncertain right now...they are still just as uncertain for sure but snapping from the pressure of it all is just not an option...and my mindframe coming home was of escaping the only way that seemed possible at the time...but there is no return ticket for that trip
So finally after months of winter with no end in sight and spending all our free time thinking about upgrades to the house and walking the aisles of the home improvement stores for exercise as much as anything, there is finally light at the end of the tunnel.
So why am I going with just myself and Jaiden? I would LOVE this to be a family vacation but we can't afford air travel for 5 and the boys would be out of school for over a week. Cody just came home with a new job yesterday (YAY Cody!!!) He was hired at Dairy Queen...so that means he will be working and not able to take of for a whole week...Scott is saving his leave to use for terminal leave after retirement...so that just leaves Jaiden and I.
She is so very excited about our trip...I showed her the photo of the hotel and I think the only think I need to pack is her swimsuit...she saw the pool and just about lit up like a Christmas tree...that is what prompted me to hit the submit button...that look on her face was priceless...and she has been talking non stop about "spring" and going outside to play in the sprinkler...and being able to finally wear shorts...because I won't let her wear them in winter...she runs around bare foot most of the time...her flip flops replace her crocs as soon as she gets in the door good every afternoon and they usually never leave her feet until right before walking out the door the next morning...so I think she will love the sandals kinda attitude of Florida.
Our trip is from Mar 10 - Mar 17 and I must get started on an itenerary soon. Right now I do not have a plan to get to the airport yet...we are leaving from MSP. It cost the same to fly from here to MSP as it does from MSP to Orlando...so that is not an option. I will probably drive there but I need to figure out a way to get the car away from the airport as parking costs are astrocious. I am hoping I can find an inlaw willing to make the trip to the airport with me. Its a 5.5 hour drive from here...2 hours from Scott's hometown...so my prayer is that will fall into place and my boss will approve my leave...and my family will not be furious at me for not attending this years family reunion...I hope they will understand...
So Jaiden and I are now going to take a little vacation...to FLORIDA!....for 5 days we will be able to get outside and play :) I am so excited about that....I can't hardly breathe here anymore, being cooped up indoors for 5 months and then being sick on top of that...is just misery.
Its still sinking in...after I hit book the trip of course a million doubts crept into my head so I could hardly get to sleep last night. Scott is supportive of this, it was his idea that I take a trip and he made the suggestion months ago...but I didn't want to spend the money with things so uncertain right now...they are still just as uncertain for sure but snapping from the pressure of it all is just not an option...and my mindframe coming home was of escaping the only way that seemed possible at the time...but there is no return ticket for that trip
So finally after months of winter with no end in sight and spending all our free time thinking about upgrades to the house and walking the aisles of the home improvement stores for exercise as much as anything, there is finally light at the end of the tunnel.
So why am I going with just myself and Jaiden? I would LOVE this to be a family vacation but we can't afford air travel for 5 and the boys would be out of school for over a week. Cody just came home with a new job yesterday (YAY Cody!!!) He was hired at Dairy Queen...so that means he will be working and not able to take of for a whole week...Scott is saving his leave to use for terminal leave after retirement...so that just leaves Jaiden and I.
She is so very excited about our trip...I showed her the photo of the hotel and I think the only think I need to pack is her swimsuit...she saw the pool and just about lit up like a Christmas tree...that is what prompted me to hit the submit button...that look on her face was priceless...and she has been talking non stop about "spring" and going outside to play in the sprinkler...and being able to finally wear shorts...because I won't let her wear them in winter...she runs around bare foot most of the time...her flip flops replace her crocs as soon as she gets in the door good every afternoon and they usually never leave her feet until right before walking out the door the next morning...so I think she will love the sandals kinda attitude of Florida.
Our trip is from Mar 10 - Mar 17 and I must get started on an itenerary soon. Right now I do not have a plan to get to the airport yet...we are leaving from MSP. It cost the same to fly from here to MSP as it does from MSP to Orlando...so that is not an option. I will probably drive there but I need to figure out a way to get the car away from the airport as parking costs are astrocious. I am hoping I can find an inlaw willing to make the trip to the airport with me. Its a 5.5 hour drive from here...2 hours from Scott's hometown...so my prayer is that will fall into place and my boss will approve my leave...and my family will not be furious at me for not attending this years family reunion...I hope they will understand...
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Sunny Saturday
Its such a beautiful day...the high is supposed to be somewhere around 12 degrees today....feeling a bit like going OUT and doing SOMETHING....what is there to do? Ideas? Anything???? The wind chill is -4....so outside activities are limited.
The kids are going stir crazy...I am too...what oh what is there to do????
SEDENTARY:
It is characterized by sitting or remaining inactive for most of the day (for example, in an office), with little or no exercise. It is believed to be a factor in obesity, and, as such, may contribute to other diseases, such as type II diabetes, heart disease, depression and even hemorrhoids....OH JOY
Lack of exercise causes muscle atrophy, i.e. shrinking and weakening of the muscles and accordingly increases susceptibility to physical injury. Additionally, Physical fitness is correlated with immune system function; a reduction in physical fitness is generally accompanied by a weakening of the immune system....WOULD this could this explain the colds that we have been having? Jaiden and Jared both have colds now too.
Despite the well-known benefits of physical activity, many adults and many children lead a relatively sedentary lifestyle and are not active enough to achieve these health benefits. A sedentary lifestyle is defined as engaging in no leisure-time physical activity (exercises, sports, physically active hobbies) in a 5-week period....or try a 5 MONTH period...this SUCKS...I hate being indoors...being forced to be indoors has to be 10x worse
The kids are going stir crazy...I am too...what oh what is there to do????
SEDENTARY:
It is characterized by sitting or remaining inactive for most of the day (for example, in an office), with little or no exercise. It is believed to be a factor in obesity, and, as such, may contribute to other diseases, such as type II diabetes, heart disease, depression and even hemorrhoids....OH JOY
Lack of exercise causes muscle atrophy, i.e. shrinking and weakening of the muscles and accordingly increases susceptibility to physical injury. Additionally, Physical fitness is correlated with immune system function; a reduction in physical fitness is generally accompanied by a weakening of the immune system....WOULD this could this explain the colds that we have been having? Jaiden and Jared both have colds now too.
Despite the well-known benefits of physical activity, many adults and many children lead a relatively sedentary lifestyle and are not active enough to achieve these health benefits. A sedentary lifestyle is defined as engaging in no leisure-time physical activity (exercises, sports, physically active hobbies) in a 5-week period....or try a 5 MONTH period...this SUCKS...I hate being indoors...being forced to be indoors has to be 10x worse
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Snap out of it already
Ok so its been 7 days since I first felt the burning throat and the first tinges of the crud coming on but for golly jeesh after a LONG weekend of nothing but meds and rest you would think that I would have gotten over it by now. I felt better yesterday and returned to work only to start coughing and wheezing again so I am on yet another sick day today...wondering if I am not just 99.9% mentally insane....I do not like being sick and normally a cold doesn't slow me down but this one has floored me. Quite literally to the point where I just stay curled in bed for hours at a time in a comatose state of mind. There is absolutely nothing wrong with me, there is no reason at all for the funk that I am in. It is so annoying, to myself, to everyone around me...I just need to snap out of it already.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Give Us This Day
I have been doing a lot of thinking over the past few days...and not a lot of blogging. So I really should put my thoughts on record. So what has been placed on my heart this week? It seems each new week brings a new opportunity or a new interest...I've been applying for jobs everywhere I can find an opening...you will never guess where the lastest opening is that I've found...there is an administrative officer position opening with the Peace Corp. This would be somewhere in the EMA region...(Europe, Mediteranian, and Asia) From reading the job description it sounds like I may actually qualify for this job...the only reason why I would qualify for this job would be because I have been here in the job that I am in for the past two years....the job that I feel I am wasting my time and accomplishing nothing in...the job where some days I ask over and over again...Why am I here?...This job has prepared me for a bigger opportunity. It wasn't a huge roadblock as I've been perceiving it to be all along but rather a stepping stone. Its humbling to see the picture that God has painted for us when He allows us a tiny hint at what could be in our futures...sure it is a job on the other side of the world and not exactly what I had "planned" but it is an opportunity that two years ago I would have run from...today I find myself eager and hopeful that I am chosen. I can't even begin to know what that would mean...but I am eager to learn.
Song of the week: Here I am by Downhere - sorry I haven't been able to find a link to share it, hope you've heard it, its a very powerful song. Many Blessings! Kim
“Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread.”
by Max Lucado
What a statement of trust! Whatever you want me to have is all I want. Some days the plate runs over. God keeps bringing out more food and we keep loosening our belt. A promotion. A privilege. A friendship. A gift. A lifetime of grace. An eternity of joy. There are times when we literally push ourselves back from the table, amazed at God’s kindness. “You serve me a six-course dinner right in front of my enemies. You revive my drooping head; my cup fills with blessing” (Ps. 23:5 MSG).
And then there are those days when, well, when we have to eat our broccoli. Our daily bread could be tears or sorrow or discipline. Our portion may include adversity as well as opportunity.
This verse was on my mind last night during family devotions. I called my daughters to the table and set a plate in front of each. In the center of the table I placed a collection of food: some fruit, some raw vegetables and some Oreo cookies. “Every day,” I explained, “God prepares for us a plate of experiences. What kind of plate do you most enjoy?”
The answer was easy. Sara put three cookies on her plate. Some days are like that, aren’t they? Some days are “three cookie days.” Many are not. Sometimes our plate has nothing but vegetables—twenty-four hours of celery, carrots, and squash. Apparently God knows we need some strength, and though the portion may be hard to swallow, isn’t it for our own good? Most days, however, have a bit of it all. Vegetables, which are healthy but dull. Fruit, which tastes better and we enjoy. And even an Oreo, which does little for our nutrition, but a lot for our attitude.
All are important and all are from God.
The next time your plate has more broccoli than apple pie, remember who prepared the meal. And the next time your plate has a portion you find hard to swallow, talk to God about it. Jesus did. In the garden of Gethsemane his Father handed him a cup of suffering so sour, so vile, that Jesus handed it back to heaven. “My Father,” he prayed, “if it is possible may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will” (Matt. 26:39).
Even Jesus was given a portion he found hard to swallow. But with God’s help, he did. And with God’s help, you can too.
Song of the week: Here I am by Downhere - sorry I haven't been able to find a link to share it, hope you've heard it, its a very powerful song. Many Blessings! Kim
“Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread.”
by Max Lucado
What a statement of trust! Whatever you want me to have is all I want. Some days the plate runs over. God keeps bringing out more food and we keep loosening our belt. A promotion. A privilege. A friendship. A gift. A lifetime of grace. An eternity of joy. There are times when we literally push ourselves back from the table, amazed at God’s kindness. “You serve me a six-course dinner right in front of my enemies. You revive my drooping head; my cup fills with blessing” (Ps. 23:5 MSG).
And then there are those days when, well, when we have to eat our broccoli. Our daily bread could be tears or sorrow or discipline. Our portion may include adversity as well as opportunity.
This verse was on my mind last night during family devotions. I called my daughters to the table and set a plate in front of each. In the center of the table I placed a collection of food: some fruit, some raw vegetables and some Oreo cookies. “Every day,” I explained, “God prepares for us a plate of experiences. What kind of plate do you most enjoy?”
The answer was easy. Sara put three cookies on her plate. Some days are like that, aren’t they? Some days are “three cookie days.” Many are not. Sometimes our plate has nothing but vegetables—twenty-four hours of celery, carrots, and squash. Apparently God knows we need some strength, and though the portion may be hard to swallow, isn’t it for our own good? Most days, however, have a bit of it all. Vegetables, which are healthy but dull. Fruit, which tastes better and we enjoy. And even an Oreo, which does little for our nutrition, but a lot for our attitude.
All are important and all are from God.
The next time your plate has more broccoli than apple pie, remember who prepared the meal. And the next time your plate has a portion you find hard to swallow, talk to God about it. Jesus did. In the garden of Gethsemane his Father handed him a cup of suffering so sour, so vile, that Jesus handed it back to heaven. “My Father,” he prayed, “if it is possible may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will” (Matt. 26:39).
Even Jesus was given a portion he found hard to swallow. But with God’s help, he did. And with God’s help, you can too.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Prayers are working...keep them up! and THANK YOU! :)
This is one of my favorite songs. It is an awesome song that fits my mood a lot of days, especially of late. Some days when there are just no words...just peace.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Spring...NOT!!!
After a weekend of warm southernly winds and sunshine, the snow was starting to melt and there are patches of ground showing through in spots...the snow turned soft and slushy...it was ALMOST like spring was actually probable....the 40 degree temps actually felt pretty WARM...but the north wind started to blow a gusty 60 mph....and this morning we are back to -11 and wind chill of -25...so spring...IT AIN'T HAPPENING :(
As anyone who knows me will know - this is like the movie - winter just keeps going and going and going - like a nightmare that I can't seem to wake up from...
As anyone who knows me will know - this is like the movie - winter just keeps going and going and going - like a nightmare that I can't seem to wake up from...
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